Have you ever wondered How To Deal With People Who Don’t Value Your Time? Maybe you’ve been having to deal with someone doesn’t seem value your time because you are a stay at home mom, work at home mom, a homemaker or a homeschooler?? Maybe you’ve been in situations where people have gone so far as to say disrespectful things about what you “do all day”?
I have been there, and it’s not a fun place to be in. Today I’m going to share a tip I’ve discovered that can help anyone trying to figure out how to deal with people that haven’t been respecting your time. Please note, this tip is specifically for when they call.
My Experiences
I’ve been at this stay at home mom (SAHM and WAHM) and modern homemaker gig for 18 years and although my interactions with people regarding this job have been mostly positive, there have been more incidents that have been less than pleasant than I’d like to report.
I don’t know about you, and this doesn’t happen to me as often as it did when I only had one or two kids, but sometimes I come across people who when I tell them I’m a “homeschooling, stay at home, or work at home mom” they somehow hear “She’s home all day so she has extra time on her hands”.
Granted, there are plenty of SAH mom’s out there that sadly have no knowledge of how to run a home (or simply lack the desire). Since there are those who don’t know how or desire to make the best of their SAH or modern homemaking time this can give those of us that take the job seriously a bad name.
Also Read How To Be Productive & Deal With “Slumps”
I realized in the beginning of this journey that there appeared to be roughly three types of views towards SAHM’s. The first were those with the utmost respect for SAH moms and their lack of spare time. The second were those that think SAHM’s are freeloaders who sit home watching TV or scrolling social media all day. Then there is the third kind. These are the problematic kind. They are the kind that like the second group think SAH mom’s don’t have much going on, but they go a step further and assume you’ve got time to hang out, talk all day, or even do favors for them and so they call or text often.
Even though the second type of person mentioned above is super annoying (and even hurtful depending on the source), I think we can all agree that the third type of person is the type that is frustrating and cumbersome to deal with.
Here are some reasons and situations where getting caught up in long phone conversations can present challenges that can actually ruin a day;
- If you have small children, then unexpected calls just to chat, or unexpected visits mean you are stuck on the phone or in conversation. It’s kind of hard to be on the phone and watch young children who seem to always have a tendency to wreak havoc and create messes that take hours of cleaning even if you are only on the phone for 5 minutes!
- And then there are calls during the evening. They disrupt dinner and bedtime, meaning you have a lot of unhappy little hungry hooligans creating protests and riots when you are most tired and worn from the day!
- Depending on your nature, unplanned calls can completely hijack your days. Personally, if I spend time on the phone during a work weekday I can never seem to get the momentum back for a productive day. This can become a real problem for those that work from home or homeschool.
- Maybe you just had a baby, and have requested family and friends text instead of call but they won’t, and you are dealing with calls that wake the baby and hijack what little time you have during those newborn weeks.
If any of these sound familiar I’m excited to share a little trick I eventually learned Although this post is geared towards stay at home, work at home, and/or homeschooling mom’s or modern homemakers, this tip really can work for anyone trying to be more intentional with their time.
How To Deal With People Who Don’t Value Your Time
Phone calls are always people wanting something from you-that something is your time. Sometimes they just want to chat or tell you something. And sometimes it’s because they want a favor. So here is what you can do when they call during the worst possible hours.
Auto responder.
That’s it! It’s an app you can put on your phone, create response messages with, and have options for how to respond. Some of them have options where you can create a custom message just for that specific person that is most disrespectful of your time, and you can create a different response for everyone else.
You can also set auto responder to allow specific people through and others can go straight to voice mail or text response.
Auto responder can be a SAH, WAH, and/or a homeschooling mama’s best friend and aide.
What To Say?
The short answer is, what ever you want.
In my case I drafted a text response saying I would be busy (schooling my kids or working) from 8 am to 3 pm, and that I’d have some time after that, but that I would be unavailable again after 4:30 pm.
Since I also was dealing with some people calling after 9 pm I would draft a separate response saying that I was sleeping (in my case it was repeatedly, and I even had a new baby-so I would turn my ringer off). I explained the baby and I were sleeping and I would get back to them the next day and that if it was an emergency they could call my husband. Nobody ever did.
Conclusion
Eventually, all those people that weren’t taking my time seriously when I told them I was working or homeschooling before suddenly got it. Something about reading my response texts got through when vocalizing to them didn’t. It probably took less than 3 time’s of them calling and getting auto respond reply’s during the hours I had expressed that I was busy before they stopped.
I think that one of my favorite aspects to using auto responder is that it gives me so much more control over my interactions with people. There are a couple reasons for this.
One of the reasons is because it helps me from being caught off guard since it makes callers text me or leave a message if the reason they are calling is actually important. This gives me time to think about how I’m going to respond and if I can fit requests in or not.
Another reason this is great is because it allows me to utilize the power of texting a response to callers, which keeps me from getting caught on the phone too long.
I’ve learned that making pre planned arrangements for catching up with people is a far better way to stay intentional with my time and still have quality time with friends and family (that I don’t have to pay for and make up for later).
If you enjoyed this article you might also enjoy these posts,
How To Be Productive & Deal With “Slumps”
The Best Time Management Secret and one of my most popular posts,
What Is A Homemaker