Organize the Family: Conquer Overwhelm and Cultivate Peace

With the arrival of summertime, I’ve been focusing heavily on 1 Corinthians 14:33, and how order (organization) can bring more peace to a family. My challenge over the last month was to Organize the Family: Conquer Overwhelm and Cultivate Peace. I feel like this year I was able to get this done in record time, so today, I’ll share how I’ve been finally advancing in this area.

Introduction

Does it ever feel like your family expects you to do everything for them? Do you ever feel like as the keeper of the home, you are not only required to manage, but micro-manage? Are you starting to feel like you are in a hamster wheel, trapped, exhausted, and like one missed step from racing in that old hamster wheel, sends you flying head over heels, batters you around, and leaves you completely discombobulated and frustrated?

What Does the Bible Say

I see so much emphasis being put on mothers to “embrace the chaos” and learn to roll with it.

Whereas I do agree that we absolutely need to learn to ride the storms, so to speak, and keep our eyes on Christ, and I know that this can help to overcome overwhelm, I also know that real life requires at least some resemblance of order.

“For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.” —1 Corinthians 14:33

This verse reminds us that God’s design for our homes is not rooted in chaos or stress but in order, peace, and purpose.

In addition to this, we are encouraged by scripture to take the time to “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

So as you step into summer, let’s look at some practical, tangible ways to bring a little more peace into your family’s rhythms.

Step 1. Diagnose the Root of the Problem

The first thing I’ve learned to do when life starts feeling this way is look for the root of the problem. If you are going to conquer the chaos, you have to have a good grasp of exactly what that chaos is and what is causing it. Until you take the time to identify what is bringing the chaos into the home, you won’t be able to address it and solve the chaos problem. Here are 3 questions you can ask yourself if you have found yourself in the micromanaging hamster wheel:

1. Is it because the family is purposely slacking and doesn’t care?
2. Is it because they simply do not know what needs to be done?
3. Is it because you are trying to go in too many directions and have too many activities happening?

In our home, I’ve found it’s not uncommon for it to be a little bit of all of the above, but more so that people simply don’t know what needs to be done and expectations are not made clear.

By the way, one of the biggest culprits that brings chaos into any home is trying to fit too much into each day. Recently, I created a free, step-by-step process to help people struggling with this. If you would like help identifying the chaos culprits and getting back your peace and time, sign up for my newsletters, and over the course of a week, I’ll walk you through how I successfully do this for our family.

Chaos Triggers

Another thing, though, is that life is ever changing and requires adaptation.

Have you ever noticed that the most chaotic times occur whenever there is a change? It could be that a new baby was born to the family, a move happens, school ends for the year, or starts back up, or that the season changed, and with it, a shift in activities.

Whenever there is any kind of change, a re-navigation must take place, and this requires some thought.

Since we just went from spring to summer, let’s take a season change as an excellent example. With every season change, there comes a shift in chores and increased activities. Around April, as life is springing, so do my kids! We have long winters in the North, and by April the kids cut loose. They remind me of those little wind-up cars that have been just waiting all winter to zoom!

So, just as the gardens need to be planted, school is still in swing, and activities start to increase and collide, it never fails. That’s when my kids get the zoomies.

I know it’s not just us, though. Summer is often imagined as a time to slow down, but for many families, it quickly fills with projects, trips. outdoor plans, and opportunities to learn and grow together. For our family, it is heavy homestead season. Between keeping up with a garden and continuing education through summer, the days can feel long and full. Without planning, the season meant for refreshment can become overwhelming.

I’ve learned that the sooner I can establish a summer rhythm that accommodates for “zoomies” and the new responsibilities, the better! The longer I wait to set aside the winter rhythms and schedules, the longer it takes to get everyone on the same page, and the more chaos rules.

Every spring and autumn brings the most dynamic shifts in times and activities. I’ve found it usually requires about a week for me to get everybody and everything re-organized with each season change.

Cultivating Peace: Organizing the Family for Summer

Here are the top ways we reclaim summertime peace, get more done, and even carve out free time for the kids (and myself) to enjoy summer.

1. Begin and End with Prayer.
   It would seem obvious, but how many of us Christian families gather together to do this? How many families would see more peace filled, and even productive days if they did? My husband leaves for work each morning before the kids are up, and we always pray together. But the kids need to be involved too, so after everyone wakes I’ve been trying to get into the habit of gathering everyone for a prayer over the day, asking God for wisdom and grace. You can pray over other things too, for example, involve your children in praying for the garden, for patience in learning, and for hearts that reflect Christ.
   
   
2. Create a Rhythmic Routine, Not a Rigid Schedule
   
   Rather than structuring every hour of the day, create a gentle rhythm. In our home, I use my planner to do this.
   
   Of course, there are certain activities that need to be done at certain times. If you don’t believe me, just ask our dogs. I’m convinced they can tell time because they always know and let us when it’s time for their meal, especially the oldest. That is how it is with certain activities though, like meal times for all the family. Dr’s appointments are another example of things that one needs to be timely for.
   
   There are activities that can be done anytime though. It’s good to keep a list of the daily activities and weekly activities that need to be done, and keep those on more of a rhythm. A steady rhythm offers security and flexibility without overwhelming the family.

Tip: Visual charts or checklists can help kids stay on track and see progress while feeling a sense of independence.

2. Assign Roles and Chores
   By assigning age-appropriate responsibilities—like sweeping, laundry days, and dishes—each child can contribute and take ownership of part of the process.

3. Rest & Reward.
   Even productive days need breathing room. Make space for unstructured family time—reading under a shady tree, drawing, resting, or simply being quiet during reading time. These moments of stillness often foster space to reset and recharge.
   
   One thing our family loves to do that creates fun time and relaxation plus stronger bonds, is to take beach days, we make our best memories at the beach!
4. Teach The Kids Organization and Executive Functioning Skills With Real Life Situations.
   Did you know that most kids do not have executive functioning or organization skills? Things like, “If I wash this plate now before the egg dries to glue it will be easy, but if I wait it will take 5 minutes of my time to chisel it off,” don’t register. So we need to teach them continually.
   
   And the challenging part, is we need to remind them more than once. I’ve found that when it starts feeling a bit like a circus around the home, and it seems everybody is waking up in the morning like a chicken, in whole new world every day, and I start feeling like a hamster in a wheel giving reminders every 2 minutes (or so it feels), it’s time to restructure, make checklists, and spend a few days helping the kids get on track (and do a better job of staying there).

What To Do If They Just Don’t Care

Let’s say you have done all the above things, but it doesn’t seem to make a difference because the family simply doesn’t care. They are perfectly fine to let you make every meal, wash every dish, do every piece of their laundry, and clean up after them.

In this case, we are dealing with a heart issue.

If this is what we are dealing with, the first thing I want to encourage you with is it’s helpful to remember Jesus. He knows exactly what this feels like. Have not we all treated Christ the way our families treat us at times, like He is just there for us to call on when we need something, and have we all not acted like we have no responsibility in Christ at times?

And if we are being honest, is not motherhood an experience that is there to make us more like Jesus?

With that said, if we are dealing with a heart issue, it’s because we have more training and discipling to do. We, as the keepers of our home, are the ones who are supposed to be teaching not only life skills, but character.

So we have to go back to the heart. When I’m doing heart training I have found that love, eye contact, and 10 words or less are key!

Something else that helps is to explain the why. When you explain the why to your kids, you move from dictator to a leader that they trust, and eventually may want to follow.

For example, if you are trying to teach your kids to wipe down the counter after they make a snack, and you explain things like how if they don’t then everyone could get food poisoning the next time they come to make something, it’s quite effective to help them to remember to clean up after themselves!

And if you explain their frustration with not being able to find their misplaced items is because they didn’t tidy their room like you have been trying to get them to do, things will eventually start to register.

Another thing that can help is to remind them of what the Bible says.

Years ago, in one of our old homes, I had 1 Corinthians 14:33 framed for my kids in their room, and still, I try to make this verse come alive to my kids by using their rooms as an example. When they don’t keep their rooms clean and can’t find their things, I would point out that the irritation they are feeling isn’t peace. I remind them that if they kept it orderly, they wouldn’t feel irritated.

But alas, kids and even teens need help and suggestions on learning how to clean their rooms sometimes. So it’s not uncommon that I help the younger ones and give the teens some ideas for organizing spaces they seem to be struggling with. Once the room is almost clean, I always notice the kids start to become so happy. At that point, I try to help them be more self aware and say, “Doesn’t that feel so much better? This is what having things in order feels like, it’s peaceful!”

Final Thoughts: Let Peace Take Root

Organizing your family’s summer doesn’t mean creating a perfect plan—it means seeking God in your plans. By prayerfully bringing your days into alignment with His ways, focusing on togetherness and teamwork, you create a home environment where growth—spiritually, academically, and maybe even your backyard garden—is nourished.

Let this be the summer your family cultivates not just fruits and vegetables, but patience, purpose, and peace.