Is A Stay At Home Mom A Foolish Woman? The answer is yes, some are. But allow me to explain, I promise you won’t be sorry.
For decades the women’s liberation movement would have us to believe being a stay at home mom, or a stay at home wife, was a foolish decision. Have babies? Ick! How degrading!
If, however, you are crazy enough to want kids that’s okay. They say a woman can have a career and a baby or two as long as she holds down both. A woman shouldn’t have to pick, they say!
And rely on a man? What a foolish thing to do, they say. They tell us our husband will probably leave us (which is easy for the majority of us coming from divorced homes to believe), and that we will be left out in the cold with nothing but our foolishness if we get married and rely on a husband.
But now we have the pendulum swinging to the opposite spectrum. Women are learning that there are things we can do to build strong marriages. We are learning that our children actually do need us, and that being home is not degrading but rather, quite nice.
So wives and mothers are returning to home in droves. Is this wise, or is it foolish like the media and women’s liberation feminists tell us it is?
After all, what about retirement? What about when financial hardships come?
I think if we are going to answer the question of “is a stay at home mom a foolish woman?” we first must define “wise” and “fool”.
What Is A Wise Woman?
According the dictionaries wisdom is essentially the ability to use one’s knowledge and experience to make good choices and judgments.
According the the Bible, wisdom means to be wise, which means to have spiritual and moral insight.
Proverbs 2:6 tells us that.
All wisdom comes from God…
What Is A “Fool”
First of all we need to define the word “Foolish”. I think again the best way to do this is with scripture.
According to the Bible, a fool is senseless, unwise, inconsiderate, lacking wisdom. SEE HERE.
Matthew 7:26 tells us more regarding fools,
And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.
So let’s filter the ideas swirling us through the Bible where we find some pretty interesting (and balancing) truths.
In the Bible we have a few examples of what women should do/be.
Proverbs 31 woman is one of my favorite places to learn from about being a Godly woman. The Proverbs 31 woman worked hard (verses 13, 15, 17). She kept the pantry stocked (verse 14) and the children and people of the home fed and clothed (verses 21 & 22). In verse 16 we can see that she must have invested and had freedom because she bought a field and planted a vineyard, clearly she wasn’t this timid little creature that was incapable of making big choices and moves without her husbands constant supervision. This is probably because he trusts her, (verse 11 says he has full confidence in her).
Here is the part a lot of old fashioned antiquated mindsets skip over. She had a job, (verse 24). She didn’t rely on her husband to be the sole provider.
Here is the part modern day feminists won’t like. Verse 27, “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.”
Let’s jump to Titus 2:5, Paul is speaking to the church and wants women to be;
[To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
But then we also read in 1 Timothy 5:8 that if anyone does not provide for their own, especially their family, they are worse than an unbeliever. It’s also important to note that the word “provide” includes more than just material things. It can also include counsel. And if you read the original translation from the original language CLICK HERE you can see that this includes women.
Well isn’t that interesting? Is the Bible contradicting itself? It would appear so at first glance, wouldn’t it? In one place we see a wise and Godly woman has a job, in another we see she’s supposed to be a housewife, so which is it?
I believe the answer is that it’s both.
So, Is A Stay At Home Mom A Foolish Woman?
According to scripture, being a stay at home mom is not foolish. It is Biblical.
Not providing for our family is being worse than un-unbeliever though, and it’s important to remember that providing means MORE than material things.
In Proverbs 14:1 we even have an example and definition of what a foolish woman truly is. We read;
The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
If you look up the definition of “foolish” here it means senseless, lacking wisdom, discernment or moral insight. SEE HERE.
It’s also important to know that the word “house” in this verse also includes the people of the home. SEE HERE.
So a stay at home mom is not foolish, unless she is tearing down her home. In fact, you could safely say that the foolish ones are the ones working to destroy the family unit.
The real question we should be asking if we are Christian women is, are we being wise women, like the Proverbs 31 woman and Titus 2 women, or are we being foolish women with our home and family?
Are there ways we are tearing down our husband, children, our family? Let’s explore some ways we all have probably been guilty of tearing down our homes at times.
- With Unkind Words
- Spending Too Much
- Not being wise with time and either being lazy or taking on too much/more than we can actually accomplish
- Not providing, spiritually, educationally, and emotionally for ourselves and family (let’s face it, if we are not in the Word and encouraging ourselves with spiritual food we won’t have anything spiritually or emotionally for anyone else).
- Not planning and preparing ahead as able
I will admit, too many times I have been a foolish woman. Thankfully, we are all not alone and we have help though, help in Yeshua, Jesus Christ our savior, we have the Holy Spirit, we have grace, and we have today.
The Key To Being a Wise Woman
According the Bible, we don’t have to pick family or job. We can be home with our kids like Titus 2 women. We can also have jobs like the Proverbs 31 woman. If we are truly wise we will be careful not to spread ourselves too thin, and understand that there are seasons for different things.
As mothers and wives, however, home is to be our priority. Building up our home and family, but we cannot do this if we are empty, depleted, and drained. It is not in our strength to be wise either.
John 15:5
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
From these verses, we can see that if we are going to be wise, we must tap in to our Creator. It’s that simple. If we do this, then we will be walking in the spirit and wisdom will guide us.
Instead of trying to fill our cups by taking on more projects, or buying more, we can be fulfilled with the peace of Christ. Instead of being irritable and angry, we can find progress and healing (which is a journey), and we can learn lovingkindness. Instead of neglecting our family’s spiritual, emotional and physical needs, we can grow in our walk with the Lord and provide for them by sharing what we are learning with them. Instead of being lazy, we can be motivated to be industrious and invest in ways that enable us to smile at the future.
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